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-   -   Missing mom (http://www.wowwomen.com/boards/showthread.php?t=1156)

NotSocrazyJoJo May 25th, 2008 12:23 AM

Missing mom
Missing Mom
Current mood: http://x.myspace.com/images/blog/moo.../depressed.gif depressed
I really miss my mom,http://x.myspace.com/images/blog/smileys/crushed.gifyou know so sudden and not being able to say goodbye. The night before she had called me and said she was not feeling well, next day hell breaks loose, and for month and a half it was touch and go. I try to be at peace and try to know she is happy, and she is not in any pain, but somehow I don't find any comfort in that. I feel selfish, But DAMMIT I was not ready to let her go, I never got to say what I wanted to say, I never got to ask what I wanted to ask. People keep telling me she is with me. I can't feel her, can't see her. I just want one more day, I know what I want to say and ask now. Just one more day.

crazymomma May 25th, 2008 09:48 AM

(((NOTSOCRAZYJOJO))) First welcome to wow. Second, I know how you feel, my dad past away 15 years ago this month and as a matter of fact his 71 birthday would be in 2 days. It does get easier and I went throught the same as you. I was in NY and dad in Fl went he pasted. I couldn't afford to go down and I didn't know anyone who could help me. We talked on the Sunday before he pasted and his last words to me were " I love you and call me later this week. " I got to work and with everyday stuff, I never called. On Thursday at 11:15PM I got a call from mom to tell me dad was gone. He pasted quietly at home after having a cig. and kissing mom goodnight. He took a final breath and was gone.
I can tell you it does get easier and there will be days when you will still cry for her. As i said dad has been gone 15 years and I still have days I miss him so very much and I still cry and wish for one more day. To see him one more time, to hear his voice one more time.
So, you are not alone. I know you feel as if you are but you can find a shoulder to lean on here. We will listen and try to help.
So, as my mom would say, keep your chin up hon, you are stronger than you think. Big hugs and prayers.

NotSocrazyJoJo May 25th, 2008 10:42 AM

Thaks it is nice to know I have support if I need it. Hugs to you and thsnk you

IRISH_EYES_99 May 25th, 2008 08:54 PM

:boquet:((((((((( NotSoCrazyJoJo)))))))))))))))))),:boquet:

You didn't say how long ago your beloved mom passed away. Let me share a story with you. My mom got cancer. She had the surgery, was given a yr. 2 1/2 yrs later she was still with us.

I would go to my sister's on a Thurs night and stay until Sun. then my hubby and kids would come pick me up. It was done that way so that my sister and her hubby had time, and mom and I got to spend time together.

At the end of her time, my oldest daughter belonged to a drill team. They were having a competition in OHio. Didn't make it to my sister's that night, had to see my daughter off. And be home for the 2 younger ones.

When I woke up in the AM I knew... so I left the house. Couldn't get the call if I wasn't home. :( Of course I found out a couple of hrs later. Had to call the head of the drill team. Let my daughter compete.. then had her flown home for the services.

There are times, not so often now.. that I feel guilty that I wasn't there that night. Would it really have made a difference?? No!!

Felt guilty because I had been with my brother, father, mil, but not with my mom. She was such a dynamic in my life.

It's ok to feel bad. Don't let it stay with you, she wouldn't want that for you. Maybe if you'd like to post some stories, some little things that she did that brings a smile to your face. A song that touches you. .. We are here, we do care. And so many share those heartbreaking moments with you.

Don't feel alone. If you could celebrate her life? What would you do? How would you celebrate it. ...

When my grandkids come over sometimes we dance around the house.. My mom always did. Sometimes we go for walks to a nearby restaurant and have lunch.. she did that with my kids.
And bless her heart if she got mad at you, you knew.. but a wonderful thing my mother taught us.. never stay mad. It's makes you old before your time... ;) she was right. That;s why I'm still a kid at heart.

Hugs how wonderul that you give hugs. So find a way to celebrate your mom. Remember little funny things she did. Most of all do something nice for yourself. Yes, she would want you to. When you can do that. You will feel her presence more. Really. ((((((((( NotSoCrazyJoJo ))))))))))))))))))) Keep in touch. Reach out we are here. We do care. YOU ARE NOT ALONE with how you feel.

NotSocrazyJoJo May 25th, 2008 10:25 PM

Mom passed away this passed December. She had been sick since Thanksgiving, she was not so good health before that. Her stopped and they started it, fluid on the lungs enlarge heart, she just got tired, I dont feel she gave up I just think her heart could not take it. Thank you for sharing, it makes me fell better that I know I am not the only one, I just keep trying to remember that. My girls and I released green balloons, (her fav color) because we wanted to release her into heaven, we are in tx and she is in Indiana.

NotSocrazyJoJo May 25th, 2008 10:26 PM

You might know ((((dacdjr ))))she is my sister

IRISH_EYES_99 May 26th, 2008 11:12 AM

((((((((((((((( NotSoCrazyJoJo & her fantastic sister DACDJr .. Yes your mom too. )))))))))))))))))))))))) We all loved her. She was a great writer.

How wonderful that you released the green balloons.. perfect!

Extra hugs to you.. You are truely part of our family. Welcome!
Hugs to you and DACJr. Oh of course your familes too.

NotSocrazyJoJo May 26th, 2008 12:16 PM

Thank you for the hud sometimes you just need one you know

NotSocrazyJoJo May 26th, 2008 12:16 PM

I mean hug!!!! not awake yet I guess

crazymomma May 26th, 2008 01:43 PM

((((((NotSocrazyJojo)))))) Irish is (as always) :D right. Your Mom was so loved. Her and I shared a birth date.(Same year too) I loved her writing and spent alot of chat time with her. she is missed here. So, we gladly welcome another of her daughters.

NotSocrazyJoJo May 27th, 2008 01:54 PM

Well Thank you I am known as the crazy one hence my name. I know mom is watching everyday. She tried for months for me to come in this site and I did not a have good puter now I have one so I joined. I still hurt real bad but I will get thru this.....

IRISH_EYES_99 May 27th, 2008 03:40 PM

((((((((((( JoJo,)))))))))))))) Your mom Self helped push the right buttons to get you here. She did. Time helps heal. Time doesn't take all the hurt away, but it helps deminish the hurt of the loss. This was the tme you found us, it was the time you needed to be here. We are glad you're here. (((((((((( Self )))))))))) is too. Keep posting. You have to feel that we care. Hang in there, and hang on to us. We're here.

crazymomma May 27th, 2008 08:26 PM

Amen. What more can I say? big hugs to you both.

NotSocrazyJoJo May 28th, 2008 01:32 PM

Thanks I sure will, I have just today, well actually about 1 am this morning, made one of moms wishes come true. You see we have family in new york we have not seen or talked to since I was 12. Mom had been trying for years to find them. With no luck. Well I found them all of them. I have only spoke to a cousin I have never met, found him on myspace and took a chance to see if he was related and he sure is. So I say to my mom: I love you and I am reconnecting with dad's family. He(Joe) ment the world to my mom and now they are together, pulling me towards the family I don't really know.

IRISH_EYES_99 May 28th, 2008 06:17 PM

wtg! I hope it all works out for you. What a gift to be reconnected with family. wonderful.

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