Thread: Celibacy
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Old July 20th, 2001, 10:35 PM   #12
Ayla
Registered User
 
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Edmonton, AB, Canada
Posts: 50
when confused, don't make life more complicated

Hi all,

What do I have to say about celibacy? Mostly that it saved my sanity. I was celibate from the age of 17 until just after my 28th birthday. You heard me, 11 years. Why? I was confused about who I was and what I wanted. While most of my friends who now identify as lesbian were out getting too much sex with men, becoming pregnant, getting married, etc, I was staying at home tending to my crochet and needlepoint. I knew something was different but I could not determine just what it was. I honestly could not see the difference between men and women (still don't actually) and for the longest time I said (thought) I was asexual. I now know I am a lesbian leaning bisexual. Happiest with women but undeniably attracted to both.

Now i'm nearly 32 and once again I am in a celibate stage in my life. This time its more about me figuring out what I want to be when I grow up then it is about sex/gender questions. Why add sexual relations to the mix when my head is all clouded up with issues of what to do and where to live? It hasn't been that long since my last encounter, only a mere 8 weeks but I suspect this dry spell won't be over for a while yet.

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