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Old October 6th, 2002, 07:04 PM   #20
Lou's Avatar
Join Date: Feb 2001
Posts: 1,159
Bill Gates dies.

When he meets God, God says, "Well, Bill, I'm really confused on this one.
I'm not sure whether to send you to Heaven or to Hell. After all, you
enormously helped society by putting a computer in almost every home in the
world, and yet you created that ghastly Windows. I'm going to do something
I've never done before. I'm going to let you decide where you want to go."

Bill Gates said, "What's the difference between the two?"

God said, "It might help you decide if you took a peek at both places.

Shall we look at Hell first?"

Bill was amazed. He saw a clean, white sandy beach with clear waters.

There were thousands of beautiful men and women running around, playing in
the water, laughing and frolicking about. The sun was shining and the
temperature was perfect.

"This is great!" said Bill. "If this is Hell, I can't wait to see Heaven."

Let's go, God says. Bill sees white clouds in a beautiful blue sky,with
angels drifting about playing harps and singing. It was nice, but not as
enticing as Hell.

Bill thought for only a brief moment and rendered his decision.

"God I do believe I would prefer to go to Hell."

"As you wish," said God. Two weeks later, God decided to check up on the
late billionaire to see how things were going. He found Bill shackled to a
wall, screaming amidst the hot flames in a dark cave. He was being tortured
by demons with pitchforks.

"How ya doin', Bill?"asked God. Bill responded with anguish and despair,
"This is awful! This is not what I expected at all! What happened to the
beach and the beautiful women playing in the water?"

"Oh, that," said God. "That was the screen saver."
We must travel in the direction of our fear. --John Berryman
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