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Old October 30th, 2004, 12:16 PM   #26
, a gr8 peer support
pegasus's Avatar
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: NH
Posts: 50
well my story is a bit different from the norm, and yet not completely unique i have found. I can look back ( ahh that 0/20 hindsight) and see red flags just begging for attention about this from real young, like 8 or 9. But i was raised in an extremely strict and religous household.( my gr pa was a lutheran pastor and my mom was fully involved in the church all the time including employed by throughout the years, my first "real" job was in the church)
So i was not allowed to THINK it much less BE it.
I married a man that I still consider one of my soulmates. We had allowed a so-called friend to stay with us as she needed help. She proceeded to blantantly angle for my husband. During this time i engaged in a situation with both of them, as a weird attempt to keep him, and found myself , well, doing things, to HER> I shoulda known then, u would think, but i believe it scared me so badly that i shut it away again and it didnt wiggle out for another decade, sad to say. I went through several hetero relationships, including another disastrous marriage from which my son and I became co survivors of abuse.
So when the thoughts started to creep into my head again, i had met a man that actually gave me the room and support to come out. I had one other very brief hetero relationship, ( i think i had to "make sure") but since then i have never looked back and guys are for friends and sons and dads now, but nothing romantic. I am quite content that is be so.
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