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Old July 26th, 2008, 12:23 AM   #18
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Join Date: May 2008
Location: Montana
Posts: 1
My husband (many will remember me talking about "Old Dirt") died last Christmas Eve, 2007. He had metastatic prostate cancer that caused horrible suffering for him in the last months, and I have often said that I think I have PTSD in the wake of the experience. Two months before he died, a hospice nurse told me that I was going to go through everything that he would go through, and it turned out to be the gospel truth!

I used to think that I could empathize with widows, but now I know it is impossible unless you have been through it. Like you, RJS, I have lost a number of loved ones. One time there were five within a one-year time span, which really knocked me off my feet and was the main reason that I moved from a large city to rural Montana, to just get away from it all. The last seven months have been tough, of course, and those people are right who say it just takes time. There's no way to walk around it; you just have to go straight through it. The moments of raging grief can come unexpectedly and be triggered by just about anything mundane, like a sappy commercial on TV or something like that.

Anyway, my greatest comfort now is realizing that since my husband is not suffering anymore, he wouldn't want me to suffer either. I try to go forward the way I think he would want me to -- and thank God for God. My faith is what has carried me through.

By the way -- {{{{{{{hi, there, Irish Eyes!}}}}}}}
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