Thread: Celibacy
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Old December 18th, 2008, 11:22 PM   #22
Nimue
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Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 14
I have been celibate for over two years. I am middle-aged and I have never been married, also I have never had any children. I found myself in relationships with abusers, men who I was drawn to because they had qualities similar to my father and mother. It felt familiar to me and like an opportunity to try to gain the person's love, trust and acceptance, just like when I tried to gain the love, trust and acceptance of my parents. Also I kept finding myself with married men, I guess they were the available ones and I never found out till I had committed in some way. Anyway.. I had enough and I got hurt one too many times. Also my conclusion now is that if someone can't love you for who you are then they never will no matter what you do for them. Love probably shouldn't have to be earned. I might try dating again in the future but I have needed the time off.
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