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Old May 6th, 2001, 09:26 PM   #48
bikerxena
Biker and Animal Lover
 
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Join Date: Feb 2001
Location: So Cal
Posts: 327
{{{{{Les}}}}} Thanks for reading all that! As for your question, "are you feeling shameful at getting the magazine or belonging to Weight Watchers?," it must be at getting the magazine, since I don't (and didn't ever) think of myself as belonging to Weight Watchers. I just wanted to buy that WW kit, and even asked them *not* to send the magazine, which they didn't/couldn't honor. You're darn tootin' it's humiliating to be 100 lbs. overweight! I know it annoys you when really fat people brag that they lost like 20 or 30 lbs., but imagine losing 20 lbs. and *no one can tell.* It sucks! I know I'm fat, I know my neighbors know I'm fat, and I think it's a mark of civility that we don't acknowledge it in passing conversations. I think it's mightily awkward, shameful, and embarrassing to be carrying around a magazine that screams, "I'M GROSSLY OBESE, GONNA DIE YOUNG, HATE MY BODY, PLEASE STARE AT ME AND MAKE HATEFUL COMMENTS WHEN I'M OUT OF EARSHOT." I'd rather just get the helpful info anonymously, preferably online. Like I said, I'm not the support group type, at all.<p>
When I see what my one trainer buddy eats (he freely admits he eats a MUCH worse diet than I do), I know it's either genetics or exercise - that food isn't *irrelevant,* but it also isn't the key component. I truly expect to be vindicated (possibly posthumously) in thinking that weight is mostly genetically determined. That doesn't mean I don't think you can affect it - but it's like being dealt a good poker hand or a bad one - a lot is in the initial luck of the draw, and from there it's in how you play the hand. I entertain vain hopes that they'll find something in The Human Genome that will allow them to recalibrate metabolism so someone like me, who doesn't eat that badly, doesn't end up 100 lbs. overweight and in fear for her life. My anger stems from fear and rejection. I live in the land of the beautiful people, so it's rubbed in my face on a daily basis. Small wonder I hibernate a lot. <p>
It's a gorgeous day out, and I've been doing laundry - I haven't even been outside the front door. If I were "acceptably thin," I know I'd do more. What a vicious cycle. It's entirely possible that the main reason I missed the big boat party yesterday was as much due to not wanting to see all the skinny chics as it was due to the blisters. BTW, I am glad I tossed the dang sandals - the blisters have gone down already, so I caught them early.<p>
And yeah, maybe someday I'll open that WW box again, but it's not like I don't know what they tell you to eat, and I just can't eat most veggies. I really need to exercise most of all.<p>
Anyway, sorry if I sound angry, jaded, maybe even partially defeated, but...walk a mile in an obese person's moccasins, and you'd know the anguish. Not that I'd wish it on you or anyone, of course!<p>
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