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Old January 12th, 2001, 10:28 PM   #1
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Old April 2nd, 2002, 03:00 AM   #2
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Exclamation Sexual Harassment

Hi All

It is so very disappointing to notice that a lot of people don't understand the seriousness of sexual harassment and the lifelong repercussions it could have on the victim, especially in the work place.

Let me list a few of the effects of sexual harassment here:

1. Organisational Effects

bad publicity
litigation and expensive legal battles
low productivity
bad work relations/victimisation/lack of cooperation

2. Effects on Victims

physical injury as in assault or rape
psychological problems such as: self-doubt, self-blame and denial
avoidance or fear
loss of trust
loss of promotion, salary increases or other benefits/dempotion

These are just some and the list just grow longer.

We see how people get active when a woman was raped. Allow me to remind you all that rape is the worst form of sexual harassment.

So, come-on sisters, get serious. Remember next time it could be you. I know because I'm a servivor and I'm working with victims of sexual harassment every day.

For those of you who are serious and concerned, get connected. Because only through the combined efforts of all women can we curb this evil.


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Old April 9th, 2004, 08:03 PM   #3
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sexual harassment, unfortunately is in the eye of the beholder, which makes it difficult to get anyone to respond
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Old April 10th, 2004, 10:57 AM   #4
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Sabra you are right sexual harrassment is in the eye of the beholder. But If you tell some one their comments or actions are un welcomed and they continue it is sexual harrassment. Heck if elementary school students are supossed to understand and get discplined for sexual harrassment I think adults should be able to figure it out LOL. Of course some peopple just don't get it <sigh>. I know I was harrassed when I was 18 .. when I finaly said something the person who I acused of harrassing me told me my job was in jeapordary .. which I beleived cause he was real close with the admintstrator. To this day I regret not staying and standing up for my rights.
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Old April 12th, 2004, 11:09 PM   #5
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Sexual Harrassment in the eye of the beholder.. interesting concept.

Any unwanted, unwarrented type of advance.. is harrassment. Especially if the "victim" lets the "perpretrator" know this is unacceptable.

In my own opinion what has made it harder especially for women. The ones that accuse falsely. When that happens it downplays the seriousness of this crime.

Minty, what you brought up is a valid point. I would hope in this day/ age that that type of behavior is less prevalent in the work place. Hope it is not tolerated.

A few years ago it became mandatory for all city/ school empoyees to take a course on.. "Sexual Harrassment" and what constitutes the harrassment. That should be shown at every place of employment. IMO Along with the video, & speeches were tests that had to be answered.

Do you stop everyone from telling jokes, making innuendos?? No absolutely not.. But you can decide what, or by whom you would want to hear it from. Or if you don't want to hear it. That's part of choice.

The key words are "Unwanted, Unacceptable. Unwarrented" actions, touches, words. What makes you feel uncomfortable. I taught my children when they were young.. if someone does something YOU DON"T WANT DONE you have the right to get angry. That anger may save your life.
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Old April 13th, 2004, 12:06 AM   #6
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The other thing that certainly doesn't help and makes accusers out to be laughable nutcases are screwballs like Audrey Seiler...

I hope I'm not alone in saying that story absolutely infuriated me.


Irish, you raise a good point. Many HR departments are offering courses and orientation sessions on this topic. I hope to see this continue. I'm sure there are many of us here who have experienced unwanted attention in the workplace. What is about "No Means No" that gets lost in the translation or jumbled so as to be interpreted as "No Means Maybe" ???

I digress...
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Old April 13th, 2004, 01:08 AM   #7
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I think cases like Audrey Seiler are pretty rare. I'd like to think that she's got emotional problems, and wasn't just trying to mess with the system.
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Old April 13th, 2004, 02:45 AM   #8
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I agree, Liam, but by the same token, I do think it does perhaps set us back. FWIW.

Poetic justice would be if they send her the bill for $70,000.
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Old April 13th, 2004, 05:41 AM   #9
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And then there's Dar Heatherington... Well what can I say about <i>that</i>?

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Old April 13th, 2004, 05:46 AM   #10
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While it's true, Liam, that in each case, these women are probably "off," I really do hope this doesn't add further fuel to the "crying wolf therefore all accusations must be false" fire...

Hard to say to what extent stories like this hurt legitimate victims' credibility, not to mention their willingness to step forward.

The sad thing is that this continues to be a prevalent issue: it seems to me that many, many cases go unreported because victims believe they will not be taken seriously, that they are seeking attention, that they are being vindictive or "using" other people to climb the corporate ladder. A myriad of other "reasons" may be used to "rationalize" keeping quiet.

It is a very sad thing indeed, IMNSHO, but as I said before, I'm glad more companies are becoming more proactive in their efforts to educate staff about this.

There are even online modules that allow interested persons to learn more (from an HR standpoint) about this and about developing policies that address and hopefully mitigate the problem.

Of interest:
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Old April 13th, 2004, 07:06 PM   #11
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aaaah, interesting topic

i have to agree, sexual harrassment is in the eye of the beholder. some people can do or say things to me that i find amusing, yet if someone else does the same it would infuriate me

it all depends on how comfortable we feel with that person, doesn't it? i have a few same gender colleagues, all married, who seem to cherish every opportunity to brush up against me with their breasts... do i feel harrassed... not really, i am bemused more than anything ( i guess because deep down i know it has no potential). if however a male colleague would do something similar i would smack him LOL no, i wouldn't i would tell him that it is against the code of conduct and if it continues i would report him.
i have seen time and time again where females have jokingly hugged or smacked a male staff member on the butt, they just laugh it off or jokingly say something about sexual harrassment, however if it was the reverse all hell would brake loose.
i think men are subjected to it as much as women, they might be afraid to report it in case they get seen as "being something wrong with them" ... the boss would laugh them off and say...lucky you
just my thoughts on that matter, sorry if its all over the place LOL, only just got out of bed
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Old April 14th, 2004, 03:24 PM   #12
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When I was working, I had 40 women and 5 men that I supervised. I finally had to send out a written memo that "male bashing" would no longer be tolerated. Not the same as sexual misconduct, but it was so pervasive and the men were in the minority. The men came to me and asked that I do something because they were afraid to speak up for for fear that they would be accused of sexual harassment.

The eye of the beholder is interesting, but doesn't really mitigate the fact that certain behavior simple should not be accepted. I've been in the position of "victim," but didn't accept that role as I fought back. What I found difficult was the attitude of men older than I. When they said they didn't understand, I finally replied "would you approve of a man treating your wife this way?" That finally did it, plus I reported them and kept a log. I really don't like any situation where I feel like a victim. It simply makes me angry and I fight back. I have always found that being a bitch can be helpful. LOL!
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Old April 15th, 2005, 08:09 PM   #13
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All of htese are very good points to acknowledge

I am a student, and conducting research into the effects of sexual harrassment.

I am interested to find out if anyone that participates in this site has ever been harrassed, and if they would feel comfortable discussing it?

On a personal note, I know that I will not be put in a situation where that will occur more than once. "I was looking for a job when I found this one." On a funny note, at my age it would kind of be like being carded for alcohol. Nice ego booster.

But back to the seriousness of the problem. One person here has already discussed that it is unwelcomed advances. But it can also be defined as comments, jokes and personal conversations that are overheard as well.

Research shows that since the legislation requires employers to provide education, the amount of cases filed for both men and women have gone down.

I have never been what I would call sexually harasses in the workplace. So I have no experience regarding this topic. But my researching of this problem shows that some of the effects can be very similar to rape. And the effects to those that have experienced this are long lasting.

My heart goes out to those that are suffering from this and have not found their wat back. please know that all of us are praying for you.

Again, if anyone would like to participate in my research regarding the effects, please post your comments.

Thank you for allowing me to join the group.
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