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View Poll Results: Do you feel the same way I do?
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Old April 13th, 2005, 05:57 AM   #16
peachface
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Re: Do you have a lesbian friend or family member?

Quote:
Originally posted by katherine
I am fifteen years old, and I live in a very small homophobic community in northern California, and my grandmother was a lesbian. I loved her so much, she was the best person I knew. She died five years ago, and it is so painful to hear my friends talk about how wrong and disgusting being gay is. I completely dissagree with them, of course, but I feel like if I say anything then they will think I'm weird. I loved my grandma more than anybody in the world, and I get so frusterated because I feel like people are attacking her when they talk like that. I just feel like if they knew her then maybe they would feel differently. Maybe they could see for just a second that being gay isn't some disease that you have to stay away from. Since I can't talk to any of my friends about how I feel, I was wondering if maybe anybody out there felt the same way as I do, or just understands my pain.
Thank you for listening.
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Old April 13th, 2005, 06:16 AM   #17
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Im very sorry for your loss and the way ppl are talking about her. I am a lesbian, I knew when I was 16 but I didnt come out till 30 yrs later. The only way I was able to come out was because my nephew also came out that he was gay. I was waiting for at least one person to say something nasty about him and when they did I disowned that person for the rest of my life and it gave me courage to come out and soon learned not to listen to what others say, but i've been lucky, I know it must be hard having to listen to those people who say things that hurt you especially when that person has passed away. At least your grandmother is in a better place now and will be respected by everyone, she is probably up there having a good laugh about the ones talking about her. She will get her own back when she can. I'm sure your grandma wont want you to worry about what others are saying, she will want you to be happy and live a good life and believe in things that you believe in now
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Old July 30th, 2005, 02:48 PM   #18
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The other day, I was at a study session with my youth group, and the conversation turned to gays. My youth group leader "does not believe in such things", as she would say. One of my friends actually told my youth leader that she used to feel the same way, but that I showed her how to see a person for who they are and not just their sexual orientation. I was so proud of my friend for saying that, and I was proud of myself for being able to show her views that she otherwise wouldn't have heard. I am so grateful for my Grandmother. If it weren't for her, I might be as close minded as some of the adults that I have to listen to.
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Old August 7th, 2005, 01:25 PM   #19
WillowWOW
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Talking Wow and bless all of you!

(((((((((Peachface Katherine))))))))))))

Ya'll are some amazing people. Yet this world needs more of you. Its not easy being the one listening to others say the ignorant things of anyone let alone a person who has passed on. Its not our place to judge but love one another as we would want to be loved in return.
It doesnt matter to me one iota if you are gay lesbian or whatever, its how you treat my family and I.
I do have a baby brother who is gay. Plus I know many lesbians bi and gay people. They have the right to choose their lives as they wish. I choose to love the person as they are. We are complexed individuals. One aspect of that complexity shouldnt matter when its the heart of the person that should.
When my baby brother came out of the closet, I choose then and there to love him cause of who he is not what he has chosen. I grew up with him playing in the fields and forests. Going swimming and etc learning many things together we did. Yet I have learned that I may not like what a person does i.e. drugs but I can still love the person. That is my choice and I think that is the best choice in order to live this life in the world as it is.
For I dont want to be judged by others but be known for how I am and how I treat others. With total love and friendship.

Glad to hear that others are like minded like myself.

Have a great day!
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Old August 7th, 2005, 07:41 PM   #20
WA114
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Dear Katherine:

I applaud you for your open-mindedness and at such a young age too.

There is a greater cost to homophobia than just rude remarks and discrimination. Sadly, until more people open their minds and hearts, there will be a human cost too. Think of Matthew Shepard, for instance -- or of any GLBTTTIQ person who is the victim of assault (or worse) simply because of who he/she is.

Unfortunately -- and Denzel Washington's character in <i>Philadelphia</i> stated it very well -- often times, because of our conservative upbringings and the way in which many of our values are shaped by [outmoded] religious teachings, we are taught to think that homosexuals are promiscuous perverse people whose only preoccupation is to get into your pants, molest your children, and lay anything that moves.

I don't subscribe to that way of thinking, and I know you don't either, Katherine. I happened across a handful of very useful articles recently, and I've been granted permission to reprint them. It's up to you whether you choose to read them or to share them with others, but I'm offering them to you in any case.

<a href="http://www.womensweb.ca/lesbian" style="color: red; text-decoration: underline">What is lesbianism</a>
<a href="http://www.womensweb.ca/lesbian/queer.php" style="color: red; text-decoration: underline">The meaning of queer: Moving beyond our resistance to language</a>
<a href="http://www.womensweb.ca/lesbian/youth.php" style="color: red; text-decoration: underline">Bringing youth voices out of the closet: Are you asking the right questions to help prevent suicide?</a>
<a href="http://www.womensweb.ca/lesbian/dos_donts.php" style="color: red; text-decoration: underline">Some Do?s and Don?ts for Friends and Family of LGBTTTIQ People</a>

Oh, and anyone avidly interested in women's studies and in GLBTTTIQ issues might be interested in the current double issue of <a href="http://www.yorku.ca/cwscf/" style="color: red; text-decoration: underline">Canadian Woman Studies</a>. (Volume 24, Numbers 2,3). The issue is a great reference on LGBTQ issues in Canadian and other contexts across a variety of topics.

Thank you for letting me share.
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Old August 7th, 2005, 08:15 PM   #21
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Katherine, because you seem like such a bright young lady, I thought you might like information on starting a gay-straight student alliance in your school. Maybe you can talk to other students and teachers about becoming involved.

Such alliances create awareness and action that promotes the creation of safe learning environments for all students.

You can find information on this at the <a href="http://www.teachers.ab.ca/Issues+In+Education/Diversity+and+Human+Rights/Sexual+Orientation/Gay-Straight+Student+Alliances/Index.htm" style="color: red; text-decoration: underline">Alberta Teachers' Association's SOGI (Sexual Orientation and Gender Identity) web site</a>

Best of luck and keep on being you -- you're pretty special!!
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