Women Online Worldwide  

Go Back   Women Online Worldwide > About Being a Woman > Romantic Relationships

Reply
 
Thread Tools
Old August 19th, 2011, 08:11 AM   #1
MostlyErica
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 4
Good guys.Bad guys.

Hi there everyone. I have a new topic.
I have been thinking about this for a while and decided to just share it with you. Because I feel you would understand and maybe give me some advises.
I've noticed in the past few months something that I was aware of it all my life, but couldn't say it. It's kinda weird...I don't even know how to put it. Well, since I was a little girl I had a thing for boys/ men who were troubled, who were suffering from something. Don't get it wrong...it's not sadism....Not at all. It's just...that i feel i want to be more caring with these boys/men. Especially if they are those kind of bad guys. I'm reffering to those kind of men who are mysterious, a little past troubled, rough at the exterior but really gentle on the inside . I find them really intriguing. Those men who don't share their pain and may be a little too rough sometimes because they don't want somebody to find out about them.They may look stony and unfeeling....and some women tend to get away from them because they don't know what these men are thinking. And I get them, both of them....That's why most women choose the family friendly kind of guy...the one who is always nice and makes them feel safe.
But, here is my problem. I don't like family friendly guys. It feels boring to be around them. They are predictable.
Maybe it's true that all women have at some point in their life, a thing, a crush for a "bad" guy. Maybe it's also true that we women want to protect and be caring, because this is our true nature, to nurture. So maybe, just maybe, I'm speaking from this point of view.
But...I don't know..I feel there is much more than this. I feel it's me who wants adventure...and unpredictable things....me who really believes that a man like this would make me feel complete.
Before you say something, let me clear something up. I don't like men who can't take care of themselves....i don't like pussies.To give you an example, those men I was talking about are like...well, Heathcliff from Wuthering Heighs. Not that exagerate but sort of....I didn't know what example to give you ..this is the only thing that crossed my mind.

Last edited by MostlyErica; August 19th, 2011 at 08:14 AM. Reason: correcting
MostlyErica is offline   Reply With Quote
Old August 19th, 2011, 08:29 AM   #2
Wolf_angel
A survivor of chaos
 
Wolf_angel's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: Where my heart is
Posts: 3,147
I understand what you are saying. For tis indeed in women to take care of heal and nuture others. That if fine if that is what you want. But there are every day Joes who are more violent than the ones you talk about. So it goes to remember to be safe no matter what. When it becomes violent then you have to get away. To be safe and alive. Ok?
__________________
May you walk in the shadow of the Great Spirit~To help others is a special gift we can either give or take~The more you give the more you receive~
Wolf_angel is offline   Reply With Quote
Old August 19th, 2011, 08:49 AM   #3
MostlyErica
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 4
I understand your point. But I would never fall for a violent guy. No way. Maybe the example I gave you wasn't the right one, because indeed, Heathcliff was a little bit too violent )...
MostlyErica is offline   Reply With Quote
Old August 21st, 2011, 08:25 PM   #4
Jennifer23
Jennifer23
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 3,187
Erica, there are nice guys out there. Try to find one!
Jennifer23 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old October 7th, 2011, 07:48 AM   #5
Honeybun
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Hiya Erica. I think a lot of females go through the bad-boy phase and want to fix the men in their lives, and the more distant and cold they are, the more you desire to change them.

I've been through it myself I think it's normal enough.

However, one day after yet another turbulent relationship ended, I realised that I was sick of it all. Having absolutely no stability or support or consistency in a relationship gets really, really, really boring after a while.

Y'know what's exciting? Planning to meet up with a boyfriend to go do something that you both would enjoy (even if he wouldn't enjoy it, he'll turn up anyways for your sake... and he actually shows up on time, instead of flaking on you, and has fun with you, can relax and enjoy himself instead of trying to tuck some feelings away and be "cool".

If you keep going the way you're going it will get it out of your system. (Please do not settle for abusive men! If you must, just go for the insecure, "cool", bad-boys who are relatively distant and unreliable)

Maybe one day, you'll realise you want something more and I hope there'll be a nice guy who appreciates you waiting for you, (who also happens to be extremely attractive to you)

You may want to take care of these guys, but wouldn't it be nice for someone to take care of you for a change! You deserve it.
  Reply With Quote
Old October 7th, 2011, 12:39 PM   #6
sistergirl
Member
 
sistergirl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 648
Hi Honeybun, nicely put. I've been there too with the bad boy thing, and it is exactly as you say. Time for some balance and you have to get to that place where you feel you are worthy of good things.
sistergirl is offline   Reply With Quote
Old October 8th, 2011, 09:42 AM   #7
Wolf_angel
A survivor of chaos
 
Wolf_angel's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: Where my heart is
Posts: 3,147
I agree with sistergirl! Hugs
__________________
May you walk in the shadow of the Great Spirit~To help others is a special gift we can either give or take~The more you give the more you receive~
Wolf_angel is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 01:19 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.0
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Content Copyright ?1996-2008, Women Online Worldwide