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Old January 12th, 2001, 11:13 PM   #1
AuntieWOW
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Many women, when their children grow up, change roles and definitions of who they are as the job of mothering starts to wane.....who are we then, and what kind of ways can we find to make that transition healthy and productive?
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Old March 10th, 2001, 01:28 PM   #2
antiana
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This may seem silly, but we are still wasting food. Our kids have been out of the house since the end of 1997.<BR> And not so silly all that money spent on food could have gone for many things. We are people that adore our children and its been hard to let go of old ways./me leaves leftovers.....
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Old March 10th, 2001, 11:06 PM   #3
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I hear that the kids leave..

I hear that the kids leave. In my house it they came back. To be fair, one came back ....the other never left.

I went to school to get my degree when my youngest was a sophmore. I was so afraid of the empty nest syndrome

<font size=2> I think it's a myth....<g>
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Old March 14th, 2001, 06:33 PM   #4
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I have to be honest and admit that I'm glad my kids are grown and on their own. I like having extra money and being able to stay connected to the internet all day if I want since no one else needs to use the phone.

I can do what I want when ever I want it. I find it nice and peaceful around here all day.

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Old April 15th, 2001, 06:02 PM   #5
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one kid is gone...

well, the one who left the house and came back...is gone again

We live with one kidlet at home, who works nights, so kidlet is never seen

Cooking for 2 is challenging... I went to a house of 2 ( they never had more) and watched how they cook...

actually, they don't.

If one is hungry, that one fixes food... interesting concept <g>

They eat together twice a week and after that they make sandwiches or pasta. Any leftover is put in frig.

They eat healthy and I am trying to mimic them.

wish me luck <g>

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Old May 8th, 2001, 06:23 AM   #6
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mickey, I agree. I long for the day I have my house, my car, my clothes and my computer to myself. I love my kids dearly, and I wouldn't trade the past 14 years of raising them alone for anything. But it's soon to be "my time". I know I'll still worry, they'll still be my children, I'll still be a mom, and I'm sure they'll still come around asking for money<g>

I think my mom prepared us for this when she was alive. After we all left home, she was still a major part of our lives while having her own life as well. We respected that. I think the empty nest syndrome is what you make of it.. I might be proven wrong, I hope not.
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Old October 31st, 2001, 05:13 PM   #7
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How about the empty nest syndrome from the young adult point of view?

Next month, Nov.15th, I leave my house. My mother has gone through a series of emotions. First she is extremly sweet, and does everything for me. And the next day she is full of anger, and says things to make me stay <in a guilty feeling kind of way> Is this normal?

Me, Personally. I don't see how things would have to change. Although I will be moving to Maine, and she will be still back In florida. Communication never has to suffer. And it's not like I'm moving because I'm running from something. <like she says> I'm moving because I want to be with the woman I love, and I want to start my own life. With my own ups and downs. Ya know?

So, any advice for me on how to handle my mothers mood swings, and how to make this transition more easy?

Thanks...

~Wild~
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Old April 13th, 2002, 05:37 PM   #8
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Wink

As for me, I am an empty nester....in the truest sense of the phrase---but my concern is that I have never even built the nest or laid the eggs needed for little hatchlings. I feel sad about this due to the fact that I am 28 years old and may never be able to be a mother. But I am really not sure how to deal with the idea of being at home....just myself and my husband. So although, I may be years away from the empty nest portion of my life, I am feeling like this is where I am at now, with the mourning of being alone with my spouse in a quiet home. Sunshine!
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Old January 14th, 2003, 07:21 PM   #9
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Empty Nest... Will truely be empty this week son is moving out Fri.. he and his "big sister" will be living in their own apartment in another state. While she has been on her own for a year she came "shopping at my house" rofl said the prices were better there than at the store.
She is moving on in her life.. taking her "little bro" with her. (they are 11 months and 8 days apart ) ... This has to happen I realize.. the emotions do run the gamet.. although it is good for both of them, and I suppose it is time.. but did it have to happen so fast.
Their older sister laughs at me when she calls, and asks, "Are you ok mom?" Of course I am ... My kids are getting older, I just getting better ... yup uh huh!!!!
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Old January 14th, 2003, 07:27 PM   #10
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Good for you Irish Eyes! From the tone of that post, I'd say you will all always be close, no matter how far away they go.
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Old January 28th, 2003, 08:14 PM   #11
IRISH_EYES_99
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(((((( COD )))))))))),
Yes, I agree we will forever be close no matter how far they go.

They did invite us over the weekend after they moved. The apartment is really nice. The part I loved best.. the kitchen has sliding glass doors.. when you look out you see a brook, and you see the woods. The view is breathtaking.. especially watching the sunset there. Fantastic!

Yet, after you leave the apartment.. take the car and less than 5 min you are in one the best places for restaurants and shopping. It's like having the best of both worlds.



Of course while I was there daughter and I went shopping for "things" they needed. rofl How some things change yet remain the same??

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Old June 15th, 2003, 01:37 PM   #12
DEBBIE ESPARZA
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I quess its fun when the kids are gone but, I still have a hard time accepting that they are old enough to take care of themselves, and now my worry is that my grandkids are they getting what they need I just love them so much that I wish I could move back with my daughters, I use to feel so empty but since I received the lord in my life it been easier.
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Old June 17th, 2003, 09:31 AM   #13
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I just had the most amazing weekend reunion with all of my children, and my baby grandson, and I was left with a feeling not of sadness that they are back to their own homes in far away cities, but with a satisfaction and pride that they are making their way in the world and showing independence and yet still treasuring those coming "home" moments and being together again.

I'm sure it would be wonderful to have one or all of them living nearby, but I wouldn't trade that for the unique experiences and new friendships that they are making by moving to unfamiliar cities.

When we get together, it's like nothing has changed since we all lived under the same roof.

I'm a lucky lucky woman.....
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Old June 17th, 2003, 10:23 AM   #14
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You are! But it wasn't all luck.

{{{Cod}}}

(And those guys are CUTE, too!)
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Old June 17th, 2003, 12:33 PM   #15
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Why thank you, friend!

I tend to think they are all pretty nice to look at.

((((Liam)))) who has a CUTE kid living in her house too!

I'd also like to say, and this seems the right place, that I used to dread the day that they'd all be off on their own, but, although I surely miss them at times, all in all, this phase is incredible. Of course, we ADORE the new grandbaby, but I noticed that's he's also brought new life to the entire family. Uncles, aunts, great grandparents.........everyone seemed renewed here. :-)
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