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Old December 21st, 2009, 11:47 AM   #1
Wolf_angel
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Exclamation Need help advice or knowledge

The question I have is this:
Husband of 14 years is opening a bank account with another woman since she is pregnant with his child. This bank account will be for his check to be direct deposited. The wife wont have access to this account whatsoever let alone money for the bills. What can she do? Other than get a lawyer.
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Old December 21st, 2009, 12:25 PM   #2
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Whoa! Yeah, definitely get a lawyer! (((Wolfie)))
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Old December 21st, 2009, 12:45 PM   #3
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Well, I agree get a lawyer and fast! Wolfie, he is a snake! I wouldn't suggest anything illegal like a litte sugar in his gas tank. But, this guy is not doing the right thing.
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Old December 21st, 2009, 10:08 PM   #4
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WOW! If you can't afford a lawyer try legal aide in your state. You can check out your options there. Is he still living in the house? ((((((((( WolfAngel ))))))))))))) you're a smart lady check out all your resources.
Check it out quickly. You made a referance that he was accusing you of things. Get as much info as you can. When is this person due to have the baby? Has he stopped supporting the household? Make notes, write things done, a journal or a ledger. Have a friend help document things.
Get HELP SOON.
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Old December 22nd, 2009, 07:29 AM   #5
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((((rjfeminist crazymomma IRISH))))) Well talked to a lawyer have to wait til after the holidays for free consultation. Talked with Domestic Violence in my area too. Have an appointment for counselling. Yes I have friends keeping the notes of all that has been going on since February 17, 2009. So if this goes to court I have people willing to be witnesses towards all that has transpired thus far. Thanks for the support and love shown here.
Have a great day!
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Old December 26th, 2009, 05:09 PM   #6
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Ok here is the latest, I was asked if I could live in a house with said husband his dad his girlfriend and baby. Mind you he'd be sleeping in the same room with the girlfriend. Well talked to him today and told him I dont know so dont think it would work. Which if I did know her I dont care it still wouldnt work. Then he is trying to tell me how much the bills should be and what all I would only get from him for spousal support. Well I have paid my dues and dont think I should have to pay for his "mistake" his words not mine. I have paid enough since February with mental abuse from son, sil, daughter and him. What do you think? Do appreciate all the help.
Have a great day!
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Old December 26th, 2009, 07:42 PM   #7
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NO! NO WAY, SHAPE, OR FORM those living arrangements would be more abusive to you. TELL HIM NO!
Wolf-Angel Get help. He is still resonsible for bills as your husband. What? He would move the girlfriend in, live in your room * still be married to you. How absolutely LUDICRIS!!
You deserve better than that.
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Old December 27th, 2009, 10:24 AM   #8
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((((((((((((IRISH ))))))))))))))))

LOL Actually he was thinking of buying a new house for all of us to live in. I am in the process of getting help i.e. counseling appointment with Domestic Violence on January 4 then have to make an appointment for the lawyer for a free consultation. Otherwise, he is telling lies and now they are starting to catch up! Oh well he will find out I am not so stupid as he thinks.
Thanks
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Old December 31st, 2009, 07:39 PM   #9
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Wolfie, I'll give you a call sometime tomorrow or Saturday...I've been sick the past few days...

You shouldn't have to go throught that b.s. from him or his girlfriend, etc. Grrrrr.....
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Old January 1st, 2010, 10:29 AM   #10
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No worries (((((((Rjfeminist)))))) Remember women are stronger than they think. Hence I take my strength from all of you. As well as members of my Native family! So Happy New Year's to one and all! Wishing all of you the best for the upcoming year!
Have a great day!
Please note the smiles are also on my face! LOL
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Old January 11th, 2010, 03:19 PM   #11
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Here is the blog I did today....I think it will go to show others that I mean business. Let me know what you think ok? No its not meant to be offensive or to upset anyone. Just venting and going to act on this today.

Either you do or dont! I dont care anymore. For when I care others hurt me knowing I do care more than I should. No matter what I say or how I say it or how many times I do, they are going to believe whatever they want. So if I am now untrustworthy and etc stop asking me questions and etc. Stop saying crap to me. Stop making me believe that things are going to get better when all they are doing is leading me on just to set me up to make me fall flat on my face. Then blame me for all of the crap. Well no more. Either you care about me or you dont. Either you love me or dont. Either you hate me or dont. Either you trust me or you dont. But remember these things do affect how I am going to be towards you from now. Hereby I give notice to one and all. If you are "real" then dont play this bullcrap games be an adult and real. If you say something then mean it. For the lies always come back and found out by others. If you think I will be there you should know it. If you know you have done me ill will then know I wont be there anymore. Tis your choice for now I have made mine. Live by your choices as will I. If it means I have no one in my corner or real whatevers oh well. I will just grab my bootstraps and keep walking the lone path like I have before.
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Old January 12th, 2010, 07:55 PM   #12
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well, what is there to say. If you mean this then, stand by your guns and God bless you in your choice. You are a very strong woman and I feel honored to call you friend.
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Old January 13th, 2010, 10:28 AM   #13
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Thank you very much! I am proud to call you my friend as well. Yes I will stick to my guns as I said.
Have a great day!
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Old January 22nd, 2010, 12:48 AM   #14
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Well I fell in love the old fashioned way both times. However was wiser for the second one. Put my cards on the table about what I expect and etc where it was mutual benefinicial to both of us.

Yet he was the one who strayed. He is the one who lied, He is the one causing me untold pain as well as threatened my life. Then to top it off I am a type 2 diabetic for the last two years. Recently when I have had bad episodes and needing to go to the doctor aka E.R. He shows up totally drunk to take me to the hospital? Um no dont think so. Not safe huh? Yet he can do whatever for anyone else.

They weren't there during the times of hardships, Struggling, making do from pay check to pay check. So we are doing better now. When the youngest son is almost 18 and going to leave the nest, when we can plan to do things together for us?

Now he wants me to wave a magic wand and fix all the screw ups he has done not only to me but his life. He always had my trust, love and hope and faith. Yet today he destroyed them. He has systematically done this over a 11 month period. Now I know that I will be eventually be kicked to the curb. Oh well.

I will simply grab my boot straps and keep on going.

So tell me then why? Why did he stray to another woman and fell in love? So far other than my diabetes its my fault and I am all the blame for all of this. Mind you that he has done things to cause me to fear him and be scared to be with him. Thus said what is the answer????


There isnt one whatsoever. I know. I have taken care of him, his dad, my children from previous marriage, house, animals and etc for these last fifteen years. Thus this is my reward? For keeping my promises? For being honest? For being true and faithful to him? Well I dont get that whatsoever. If someone does please let me know.

Have a great day!
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Old January 22nd, 2010, 11:08 AM   #15
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Are you talking to a lawyer yet?? You truely need to be OUT of that house or have him LEAVE the house. Even if you talk to the lawyer, YOU need to be safe. Doesn't sound like you are. What about a Womens shelter in your area. He wouldn't be allowed there, in fact he wouldn't know where you were. It's a safty issue.
SERIOUSLY!
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