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Old January 22nd, 2010, 10:29 AM   #16
Wolf_angel
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(((((IRISH))))) Well I have three safe houses in the town I am in. Plus four or five outside of town. Thus I am usually in the company of someone. If not they are only a phone call away. One practically lives around the block from me. Yet again last night things got me upset again. This time I did take my one med prior. But doesnt help to get me upset. Needless to say, he wants me to fix things or tell him how to do so. He is full of guilt and remorse yet wants to be with her. So the only thing I can do to fix it is give him the legal separation he wants. Give him a time frame to move his stuff out. From there it will be my birds and me. Now I must go and figure out the bills, the legal separation papers so I may show them to the lawyer for the free consultation I can get. For there are no more freebies in legal aide in my area right now. It was great talking to you this morning. Sure made my day brighter. Hugs
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Old February 14th, 2010, 01:28 PM   #17
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Well to continue the saga of my supposed marriage. Here is the background info. After being married for 14 years and together for 15 last year, hubby says our fighting mind you he started 9 out of 10 fights due to being drunk and etc. I will admit I did start one. Hubby found himself a girlfriend and she became pregnant. For almost the last year Feb. 17 2009 he has systematically been abusing me mentally and neglecting as well. Not only the terroristic threats (said in anger and Drunkedness or whatever he was doing) but the text messages he was doing to my phone i.e tells me he has a girlfriend and got her pregnant. As well to telling me never to call him again. So I changed my phone number. He has been telling me he is going to leave me and leave his father who lives in the house we live in with me.

Welll apparently recently his girlfriend told him to choose between us aka her or me. Well he choose me! As you can see I am not really thrilled about this due to past events over the last year. He doesnt protect me from others verbally or mentally abusing me nor does he take me to the E.R. when I am in dire need. Nor does he take care of me when I am sick. Mind you I have diabetes. Not good. I dont want to become a hermit due to my medical nor stop doing what I currently do to keep active and happy.

Thus he says he choose me but at the last minute he has to be with his buddy from work who may be dying. I understand this. Yet he has a lot to rectify with me. I dont love him as a husband anymore as a wife should. I do care about him as a friend and a person. I dont want to have intimate relations either. Mind you I was accused of giving his girlfriend and him an STD aka gonnorhea. Well I got checked out and I am clean! Wooohooooooo LOL

Now I have a male friend who I have known for many years. We have become better friends over the last few years. He has told me he is interested in me as a woman. Mind you I cant have children which he knows but he wants kids. I cant step in the way of him being happy. But he has told me well if we get together we'll adopt.

Personally I just want some friends. Need to finish up taking care of me. To get my life in order when I am doing it on my own. So if you were me, what would you do?

Thank you for reading.Please dont bash me on this. I have been treated worse than a mistreated animal for the last year however other things were happening I didnt realize over the course of three years. I have never lied, or betrayed anyone. Not happening today and tomorrow doesnt look better. Tis just not me or in me to do so even when enraged.

Thank you for any advice...wishing you the best!
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Old March 5th, 2010, 08:50 AM   #18
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Thank you ((((((goldmaiden))))) Yet fighting is all that has happened to me for over a year. Which being type 2 diabetic has some serious ramifications on my health. Thus I am done with fighting. The husband has decided when his g/f gave him an choice between her and I he chose me. This was after he was told I received a clean bill of health from the OB/GYN appointment I had last month. I care about the husband only as a person not as a husband. When we first got together I laid all the cards on the table of what I would accept and not. Husband has broken that. Thus now he wants to believe him and trust him. He wants things the way they were before. Yet too much damage has been done to me. I am ready to go but have to get things in order before I do so. My only daughter found out last night the serious ramifications of the hellish life I have been dealing with. How if I dont clean the house I wont receive any monetary funds for doctors or meds I need. As well as the crap I will get for telling her or letting her help me. This is the first time that she has done this. Asking me questions last night I believe opened her eyes a bit more. Who knows? Yet she is now so not ignorant of my life this past year. Whether or not she keeps this and remembers is another story. Thus I am going to do what is best for me. Since I know there are select family members who truley care about that. The ones who dont will be left behind when I do go. So bless them anyway for I still care and love them as I do in my own way.
Thank you
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Old March 5th, 2010, 07:39 PM   #19
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Geez Louise, Wolfie. What you are going through is really crappy. But then, you knew that, right? I'm getting ready to PM you...
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Old March 6th, 2010, 09:47 AM   #20
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LOL (((((((Rjfeminist))))))) Yeppers but as a woman I know I am stronger than what others may think or know. Hence I am more empowered by all of you!
Hugs to all
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Old March 7th, 2010, 09:58 PM   #21
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(((Wolfie))) My first husband was an abusive jerk...very abusive. One of the bravest things I've ever done was file for divorce from him. Looking back, I know for a fact that I'm a strong person...and so are you.
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Old March 8th, 2010, 08:46 AM   #22
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(((((( RJfeminist )))))) Things will happen in due time. For now I am "playing the game" Its more detailed than that but alas wont post it on here. Perhaps I will send you more info later. Busy as chaos is reigning here.
Have a great day!
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Old March 8th, 2010, 08:00 PM   #23
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Talk about chaos...My oldest son had legally changed his name at 20 to (ahem) Kaos, pronounced chaos. I ran into a friend of mine who "knew me when" and said, "I always knew you were the Mother of Kaos!"

Fortunately, son has since changed his name to something a whole lot better.
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Old March 15th, 2010, 05:41 PM   #24
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Okay, don't blast me for this. Believe me, I am on your side, but you have got to take your power back. You sound like a loving caring woman and you deserve better, but according to the law of attraction, we get what we put out. No, you're not a cheater, but you do sound like a victim and believe me you are no victim. God made you perfectly and you can have a happy life. You are right to get counseling and yes, be sure you are physically safe, but people only run over you if you send a message that says it's okay. Release your attachment to this situation and start writing down what is best for you and take steps to get that, wether it is from him or you provide it for yourself. Isn't the object of the game for you to find happiness in your life. Release any malice or ill thoughts of him, if you have any (that's just another way of giving him power) and then start putting some of the focus on you. I promise you, when your world is right within, everything will change on the outside. By the way, I am not saying don't get what you are entitled to. I am saying operate from a position of self-respect and self-love and you will end up in the driver's seat. Remember the laws of cause and effect, they are real. Not because I say so, but because, God made it that way. Yes, I am speaking from experience.

Start loving life,
Ms. Unique (sisterslovinglife.com
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Old March 16th, 2010, 01:35 AM   #25
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((((Wintoday12)))))))) Thank you for your kind words. No you didn't blast me at all. Just stated things I am working on. Yet again got another blow today. Back in February had my yearly pap, first mammogram, and a colonoscopy done within two days. Well today I got the results via a phone call. Not good on the results from the pap smear whatsoever. Here to find out I have two not one that has to be treated. One by pills which is no biggie. The other is a procedure I have to get done. Yet I have plans to seeing my son and daughter in law within the next month. Which involves travelling by plane. So one will be done the other will have to be put on hold due to the follow up appointments associated with it. Yet this is leaving me feeling like I am no good for any man anymore. Sad thing is that I have a friend who I can really be with in five years or so. Thus this is how my life is like a roller coaster. Now tomorrow morning I go to see the diabetic educator with the results. Not really looking forward to that due to the treatment I received by the DE husband who is also a secretary. Yet will go so I can deal with this new development. Also the husband I am married too, is saying how he didnt give it to me. Yet only been with one man for fifteen years. While he is the cheater. Then he is becoming a regular lordship. He demands I do. Well that isnt happening either. Yet once things are in order, I am going to do whatever it takes to get me where I want to be and mainly happy. So thanks for reading this and replying to my previous post.
Have a better day than yesterday!
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Old March 16th, 2010, 12:28 PM   #26
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Hey, Wolfie, hope you're doing a little better...
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Old March 16th, 2010, 09:18 PM   #27
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I am glad you thought the words I shared were kind. Oh my goodness, I just know that you are a wonderful person. Never think that you will be "no good for any man". As I have always shared with my girl friends there is no shortage of men, no matter what people say. If you truly want a man in your life, you can have one. You mentioned the "rollercoaster". The great thing about being on your own personal rollercoaster is that you can get off anytime you want. Also, please do not wait until things get in order, to do what it takes to be happy. Just be happy. Being happy is a decision, not a long journey. Please do not let your happiness come out, when all the challenges in your life are solved. Be as happy as you possibly can, now. It is so important to start shinning some light on your life and being happy in the moment can do that for you. Feel better, live better, and love better.

Start loving life,
Ms. Unique (sisterslovinglife.com)
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Old March 17th, 2010, 10:51 AM   #28
Wolf_angel
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Thank you again! I am usually happy with a good outlook on life in general. Its not til the idiots aka family who ruin it for awhile. It used to be where it was days and etc that was ruined. Now its only moments. I am not going to be their whipping boy nor their victim. So I am doing works in progress. Yet most of the early ones they are hindering on. But not for long!
Just dealing with the death of beloved family pet and helping another cope with the loss.
Have a better day today than yesterday!
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Old March 17th, 2010, 03:48 PM   #29
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(((((((( WolfAngel )))))))), Hope things start looking up for you. Take care of yourself. Get whatever treatments you need. Hang in there. You can & will get though all this mess.
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Old March 18th, 2010, 07:12 AM   #30
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Yes I will (((((((IRISH_EYES_99)))))))) I will do that. I will let you know more at another time.

Have a better day today than yesterday!
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