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Old February 26th, 2002, 10:58 AM   #1
kathe nichols
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Girls and Women with AD/HD

I've been reading lately that AD/HD can manifest very differently in girls than in boys. My daughter may be ADD.. not that I intend to put her on ritalin tomorrow or anything, just a direction to go in looking for strategies for coping with high school.

For starters, here's a link to a good site on women with ADD: http://www.addvance.com/

Any experiences from ADD women, or parents of ADD girls?
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Old February 26th, 2002, 11:45 AM   #2
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A student planner/day planner is a must, and I see it's mentioned on the website in your post. Ritalin isn't the only med used for ADD & ADHD...I believe Wellbutrin is another. I know there's a school of thought that dismisses meds out of hand, but it can be very helpful and shouldn't be discounted. Make sure you deal with a psychologist/psychiatrist who specializes in ADD identification and issues.

CHADD is another good organization for information on ADD.

http://www.chadd.org

A therapist can help with determining the best way for your daughter to deal with her problems related to ADD, should it turn out she does have ADD. It may involve color coding (very effective with ADD folks) and other methods to help her get and stay organized. Sometimes that's enough; sometimes meds are a big help.
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Old February 26th, 2002, 11:58 AM   #3
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Here are some links specific to ADD and school:

http://www.add.org/content/school1.htm

http://www.addinschool.com/highschool.htm

http://www.chadd.org/papers/school_discipline1.htm

http://www.ldonline.org/ld_indepth/a.../add-adhd.html
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Old February 26th, 2002, 08:31 PM   #4
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You and Your ADD Child by Paul Warren, MD and Jody Capehart, MEd.

This book was my bible while my son was in 3-6th grades. Even though he has thankfully grown out of many ADD symptoms we still use the coping skills we found helpful, in fact they have become habit. We never used medications that's not to say that they should be ruled out for everyone. ADHD is another story though.

I myself am an ADD girl and still struggle with certain things in my life, like it's impossible for me to write from an outline, I must write the full body of whatever it is I am writing and then extract an outline, doing algebra is next to impossible for me because of the sequencing involved. I learn it today but don't ask me to repeat it tomorrow. This is very characteristic of ADD.

The above book has coping skills you can teach your son or daughter or you can use it for yourself. I found it very practical and useful. A lot of stuff out there is so densly written that you get bogged down from trying to get through it. I recommend this book to anyone who is dealing with an ADD child of either sex or with ADD themselves. I agree with LF about working with an educational psychologist. We took our son to a reputable Educational Psychologist, it cost us about $1,700.00 for a complete evaluation with full testing. It was well worth it. We got detailed documentation that was very specific and had excellent response from our public school system. When the system works, it works great. By the way..today my son is in 8th grade, takes several advanced classes and was on the honor roll for the first time. He plans on going to a technology oriented high school and wants the challenges of honors classes. His long term goal is to go to MIT. I say this not to brag, but just to show you that progress can be made if you just stay focused and push for the best. Good Luck.
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Old February 27th, 2002, 08:26 PM   #5
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Hi Terri...I can't write from an outline, either...I guess I never associated that with ADD, although it makes sense.

Congratulate your son for me!
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Old February 28th, 2002, 08:36 AM   #6
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Thanks LF, I congratulate him daily! Organization is his biggest hurdle at the moment and he knows it. He is already planning to take an organizational class for students at the new high school he will attend. Organization is and will always be his struggle, it is mine too. Have a great day.
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Old February 28th, 2002, 10:05 AM   #7
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Mine's getting better.

I knew it was when another's lack of organization started to get to me!

I find color helps a lot...color coding folders and keeping a whiteboard with colored markers to track work.

Buying a house also helped...I have a big basement. ;-)
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Old February 28th, 2002, 12:02 PM   #8
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Tamara goes to a charter college-prep high school. I really wish they would recognize how much more difficult high school is than anything even these gifted kids have done before, and offer a class on organizational skills. T loves the work and not being the only smart kid around, but the additional complexity is killing her! Maybe I'll suggest it to them.
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Old February 28th, 2002, 01:41 PM   #9
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kathe: Is there a Sylvan Learning Center near you? Maybe they have something like that.
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Old February 28th, 2002, 02:44 PM   #10
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Kathe, the course at the high schools here in Florida is called Life Learning Skills, it's focus is to teach organizational skills geared toward high school and college students, all our high schools have it and it is even offered at the community college that I attend. Ask around.
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Old March 1st, 2002, 11:27 AM   #11
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The nearest Sylvan learning center is about an hour away. Wouldn't work too well for regular visits. I do have the name of a "counselor" here whose focus is mostly learning disabilities, but who sees a lot of kids who "blow up" when they hit high school. She's supposed to be very good at targeting strengths and teaching how to apply them to weak areas. She won't do the make the kids run the ADD testing gauntlet unless she sees that it's really a big component of their problem.

I've discussed this possibility with Tamara, and she thinks that for right now she'd like to see what we can do on our own with some ADD help-type books. But knowing there's an option if we can't get a grip on it has helped her already.
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Old March 8th, 2002, 10:09 AM   #12
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My son is AD/HD too, in 6th grade now. I told his new school this at the beginning of the year but was unprepared for the response I got. His teachers are like none I've ever seen. A month into the year, they called me in for a conference - not just his counselor and homeroom teacher, but EVERY teacher he had was there - and we talked about constructing a plan to help him help himself. His previous teachers from 1st - 5th grade all asked the same question: "how do I control this kid?" But these teachers were saying, "How can <u>we</u> help him? Give us your parental insight."

I was amazed. I listened to the problems they encountered and offered suggestions. Together, we worked out a plan for him. He is on Adderall, which really helps him. We keep 3 days' worth at the school in case we forget it in the morning. His teachers keep his textbooks in their rooms and gave me textbooks to keep at home for him. His homeroom teacher (also his science teacher, his favorite class) is particularly attentive to his progress and keeps me well-informed. She is a real blessing.

None of his teachers is themself AD/HD or a similar "label," so I also gave them feedback on my own experiences in school. I was a VERY AD/HD child, but back then of course we were simply "brats" or "uncooperative." High school was a nightmare, since as you've all mentioned, organization is a major obstacle. Remembering this, I sit on my son every day until his homework is completed.

The biggest problem I encountered in high school, though, was emotional. The hustle & bustle of the hallways between classes, and before & after school, was the worst. AD/HD ppl just feed off the energy that is generated in that environment. It gets overwhelming. As I fed off the energy, I felt more and more tense, and often I couldn't remember what the next class was. I'd find myself standing alone in the hall after the bell rang. The sudden quiet brought on an emotional letdown like a scaled-down version of what we all experience after the holidays - and this was a daily occurrence. It is no surprise that I suffered from depression throughout high school. How can anyone go through that and not? This is another thing I keep in mind when dealing with my son. I know I can't hold his hand in school and keep him on track, but I wish there was a way I could really impart to him what I've learned through that experience.

I coped with the energy buildup during school through my sports and music. They were the perfect outlet, sports for the physical energy and music for the creative energy. I was also a voracious reader. And even though I couldn't sit long enough to produce "real" results, I loved to write. These hobbies kept me sane. My son loves sports and music too, and I hope they can do for him what they did for me. Something else that helps him is having a mother who knows what he's going through. I didn't have that; my mother, a wonderful woman, just didn't understand me, and still doesn't, lol, but I hope that my son will realize that I DO know. I hope he trusts me.

And I know this is a long post but I hope it can help at least a little.
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Old October 27th, 2004, 10:46 AM   #13
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ADHD sigh They say it's herediatary.. My pistal packing granddaughter was diagnnosed with it. After doing some reading on it. I realized that although never diagnosed with it,, I have a lot of the signs. She is on a low dose of meds.
She just turned 7 and is in the first grade. She came home from school the first day of taking the meds so excited. She had gotten her very first 100% on her reading test,
She does go for counseling every two weeks. They are working on her self esteem. Which she seemed to have until school started. I'm hoping she will be taught ways to help her achieve her goals in life. Livi has a dynamic personality full of passion. So glad that they are recognizing ADD more and that there is help. I'm so excited I get to see my grandkids for Christmas,


*Now where are those goblins hmmm hmmmm!!! ????
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Old October 27th, 2004, 01:04 PM   #14
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/me is still following Irish... *weg*

It is a good thing... and a bad thing Irish that ADD is being diagnosed and helped... good for those that REALLY have it and need the medicine... bad for those parents who take the easy way out of parenting and ask their dr's for drugs.

Hooray for your granddaughter on her reading test!!!!!!! that is AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!


(((((((((((((((((((IRISH))))))))))))))))))))))
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Old October 27th, 2004, 01:44 PM   #15
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Okay... Here's a twist. What about kids/adults with disorders on the autistic spectrum (e.g. Asperger's Syndrome)? Any advice?
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