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Old September 15th, 2003, 04:31 AM   #1
chana
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Angry The Way it Was

The following is an article I've copied verbatim from the magazine "Housekeeping Monthly" from 13 May 1955. Sorry I can't copy the picture here that came with the article...has to be seen to be believed.
This is the way it was.

The Good Wife?s Guide

 Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready, on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospect of a good meal (especially his favourite dish) is part of the warm welcome needed.

 Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you?ll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh-looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people.

 Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it.

 Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives.

 Gather up schoolbooks, toys, paper, etc. and then run a dustcloth over the tables.

 Over the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too. After all, catering for his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction.

 Prepare the children. Take a few minutes to wash the children?s hands and faces (if they are small), comb their hair and, if necessary, change their clothes. They are little treasures and he would like to see them playing the part. Minimise all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer or vacuum. Try to encourage the children to be quiet.

 Be happy to see him.

 Greet him with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please him.

 Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first ? remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours.

 Make the evening his. Never complain if he comes home late or goes out to dinner, or other places of entertainment without you. Instead, try to understand his world of strain and pressure and his very real need to be at home and relax.

 Your goal: Try to make sure your home is a place of peace, order and tranquility where your husband can renew himself in body and spirit.

 Don?t greet him with complaints and problems.

 Don?t complain if he?s late home for dinner or even if he stays out all night. Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through that day.

 Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or have him lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him.

 Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice.

 Don?t ask him questions about his actions or question his judgement or integrity. Remember, he is the master of the house and as such will always exercise his will with fairness and truthfulness. You have no right to question him.

 A good wife always knows her place.
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Old September 15th, 2003, 09:23 AM   #2
MintyFemme2
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It is a good thing I wasn't a wife of 1955 LOL! Boo came up Thurs afternoon while I was trying to have Sallvie "help" with the last minute clean up. If any of ya'll have 6 year old boys who would rather be playing with their friends you probably might have a good idea of what Boo walked into LOL. If ya don't here is an example : Mom ( trying hard not to yell but be firm) " Use your eyes, hands and brain together. If it is a toy, put it in the toy box, a paper put it in the trash or folder. Sallvie come here , look!" Sallvie (whining and crying) " I did it already! I want to go play with Sidney! I am hungery. I am thirsty." The minute Boo walks in I stop telling Sallvie what to do and give her a kiss. She says " AHHHHHHH sounds like home" Of course Sallvie runs over thinking if he kisses and hugs Peggy Mom will let him off the hook.
We went out to Jack in the box for dinner on the way over to a friend's house so Peggy could play nurse and look at her foot.
I did have an otto man and a nice comfy chair for her to sit on for a bit though.. of course the cat thinks it is his chair so she had to push him over to the side .
Quote:
Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it
Hmm I think I have the "gay" part covered
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Old September 15th, 2003, 10:23 AM   #3
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The Housekeeping Monthly article is a fake, btw, and has been debunked numerous times online.

Not that that kind of nonsensical attitude <i>didn't</i> exist at one time...
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Old September 15th, 2003, 10:49 AM   #4
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LOL....debunked or not, I remember articles like that. I will check this one out, tho, and let the friend who sent it to me know. Thanks.

I had a copy of an ettiquette book from the 50's that had many similar instructions for women - it disappeared with other stuff from my mom's house, unfortunately.

This kind of attitude isn't restricted to just the 50's.....in the 60's I was sent to "charm school" where we were taught many of the same things as well.... Well, you see how well THAT worked..<eg>
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Old September 15th, 2003, 11:15 AM   #5
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Apparantly the material, which has been quoted widely as far as I can tell and which has been distributed all over the place, is not from a magazine. There seems to be some feeling, though, that the "guide" was originally part of a home economics text for girls - although not proven nor documented.

http://www.snopes.com/language/document/goodwife.htm

Liamfan? any other sources?
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Old September 15th, 2003, 12:04 PM   #6
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If you do a search on google on "Housekeeping Monthly Urban Legend" there are some other hits that talk about it and why it seems made up.

And, like I said above, just because this particular article may or may not be real doesn't mean that kind of crap didn't get taught at one time or another. I have a reprint of the Betty Crocker Picture Cook Book from the 50s, and some of the advice given in there is similar to what you quoted above.

I was spared 'charm school,' thankfully. Some might disagree...
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Old September 15th, 2003, 02:56 PM   #7
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The only thing I liked about charm school was the dancing....the foxtrot was blah, waltzing was ok...and this particular school was quite radical as they taught us "swing".

What I didn't like? Not being allowed to open a door by myself, put my coat on by myself, we could only sit down, walk or get up from a chair with the help of a fellow. Couldn't even get my own refreshments.... And then there was the ordeal of the velvet dresses, lace tights, and mandatory white gloves.

That crap was real.
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Old September 15th, 2003, 05:18 PM   #8
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I was a kid in the 70s and that was bad enough, having to wear dresses to school and giving your seat to adults even if your black patent-leather shoes were mangling your feet. I kind of laughed at the stories my mother told us about being a housewife in the 50s and 60s. This article reminded me of reading Adlai Stevenson's 1955 commencement speech at Smith College. They both brought back vivid memories of the Girl Pioneers Handbook (church equivalent of Girl Scouts) -- the whole handbook is about learning domestic duties and disguising them as Scout-type activities. To read Stevenson's speech, go here -- http://www.americancivilrightsreview...nonwomensplace(1955).htm
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Old September 15th, 2003, 05:38 PM   #9
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Man, where'd you go to school? Black patent leather? Dresses? In the SEVENTIES?
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Old September 15th, 2003, 06:30 PM   #10
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Early 70's and we were only allowed to wear dresses to school...and no miniskirts. If there was any suspicion about skirt length, you had to go out to the courtyard by the flagpole and kneel on the ground, the assistant principal would take a ruler and measure the distance from the ground to your skirt...anything longer than 3 inches and you were sent home in disgrace....lol

They tried a really shocking experiment around 1970 or 71....one day a week we were allowed to wear slacks to school....nice ones, of course, no jeans or anything like that...
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Old September 15th, 2003, 10:21 PM   #11
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I went to a parochial grade school. We weren't allowed to wear pantsuits until about 1976, and to this day they don't allow the kids to wear jeans or t-shirts, although the high school kids can. Gym class in a dress...*bleh*

I did that whole "walked 2 miles in the snow in the middle of freezing winter" thing for the first 3 years of school (oh, pardon me. It was 1.9 miles. 2 miles would have gotten us on the bus.) and buddy those old rubber snow boots didn't do a thing to protect your feet when you wore a dress! lol!
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Old September 15th, 2003, 10:31 PM   #12
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Thank *whomever* for public school...LOL

I basically wore boys' clothes all through high school.
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Old September 16th, 2003, 11:42 AM   #13
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I did the public school thing . My mom made us wear skirts and dresses to school though until we were in 5th grade. My first year of High School my sister wore a mini skirt and a tank top to school one day and was sent home to change. I think it was the tank top that got her sent home LOL.. I wore a mini skirt about a week before and didn't get sent home. Even though I was allowed to wear "what ever" to school I beleive in school uniforms.. but not to the extent of girls having to wear skirts only. I think students who wear uniforms all look neat and the "you aren't cool because you don't wear guess or levis" is a better learning enviroment.
Pssst I see nothing wrong with a kid giving a seat up for an "older" adult. I think it shows respect which society lacks anymore. I don't know how I feel about the guy holding the door or helping a lady out of the chair thing yet LOL. I hold doors for people reguardless of gender and I also allow people to hold doors for me.
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Old September 16th, 2003, 12:25 PM   #14
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(((((((((((CHANA)))))))))00
I just clicked on the link to "goodhousekeeping" and read the "Good Bride" article. I thought it was kinda funny LOL. I can't imagine any man or woman will to give up sexual contact after 10 years of marriage LOL. I guess we have all become more "enlighted" over the centuries and decades about roles and behaviors .
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Old September 16th, 2003, 12:33 PM   #15
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I was a child of the 60's. We wore uniforms so we wouldn't have to make decisions for ourselves.

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